I guess I kind of went against my own “words of wisdom” when after saying, don’t let the little things get you down, I did.
I guess it was more of a bunch of little things that just all came to a point. It was, “look at all these different types of oreos, and look at these marshmallows. they are square to fit on a cracker…” Then made and ate in front of me a mini chocolate cake. All of this was in the course of one afternoon. Starting with going out to dinner at one of our favorite go-to’s, that turned out to be the worst experiences we ever had there. This is always a place that is awesome. So that started the pile o’ straws that would break me that day. After getting home from eating, we stopped at the store. This started the “look at all the stuff you shouldn’t eat” montage. Then finally ending with nice, sweet. rich chocolate cake being consumed in full smelling range. Don’t get me wrong, I am fine with someone eating something I can’t. I’ve done it my whole life and it never really bothered me. Still doesn’t. BUt something about it that day, I couldn’t take anything else being put in my face that I knew I couldn’t have.
So I broke down like a child. I got asked something, or something was said to me, at this point I don’t even remember. And at that moment, I just started bawling like I haven’t in years. Maybe it wasn’t everything that happened, thats just what put me over the emotional edge. It was one of those events that I couldn’t catch my breath because I was hyperventilating. And in 5 minutes it was over and I couldn’t reason with myself why I was so upset.
And as I think back at it and any other mini meltdown that occurs, I do know that it wasn’t and never is any one thing that upsets me. I realize how emotionally, physically, mentally draining and it is ok to have moments when its ok to not be so happy happy joy joy. Here’s to a better today, tomorrow, and on and on.